boys, service, and LeatherSIRs: Mid-Atlantic LeatherSIR/Leatherboy/Community Bootblack, Baltimore, MD

Assuming the title of Mid-Atlantic LeatherSIR for the second time, Sir John is a conscientious Leatherman who wants to bring out the best in his boys. I see in him qualities that I try to groom in myself: patience, understanding, and a paternal sense of care for those men who wear his collar. A Leatherman who I am honored to call “brother.”

The mark of a LeatherSIR is not measured by contests or judge's remarks. Sir John demonstrated this well in how he treated his boys throughout the weekend. On Sunday, I entered a shared dungeon to hear Sir John comforting his newest boy. I listened as he explained about consensual Leathersex and the realization of each man's fantasies. With a clear and tender tone, he repeated his message until he felt the assurance that his boy understood.

I was also honored over the weekend to have my newest boy by my side. A paradigm of the traditional Leatherboy. Having been a Leatherboy decades ago, I understand what it feels like to wear a Sir's collar, to serve Him, to please Him, to succumb to His power during a scene.

My idea of the model Leatherboy is based on my own experience. Other sirs have their own ideas based on their training, background, and their different localities. Given this, I present a list of a few of the things that I was taught as a Leatherboy and that I value now as a LeatherSIR.

• a boy shows his respect for his Sir through good manners and protocols. he walks slightly behind his Sir out of respect. he opens doors for his Sir. he waits until his Sir is seated before dining together. he carries his Sir's bags. he kneels at his Sir's feet to put on His boots, the ultimate acknowledgment of his Sir's power. And he kneels to take them off. Protocols are only the beginning of a boy's devotion to his Sir.


• a boy is well-mannered with everyone he meets. he is never rude.


• a boy keeps himself well-groomed. This includes trimming away all hair on the torso and pubic area. I remember the first time that I shaved off my pubic hair. My cock looked larger than usual against my navel. A symbolic acknowledgment that I recognized my role as a boy, a man with less experience.


• a boy knows his Sir's body and is attentive to him during sex. he does not need to be told what to do to turn his Sir on. he knows what to do. he learns what his Sir likes and does not like. As a bottom, he craves his Sir deep inside him. Beyond submission, he hungers for sex with his Sir.


• a boy receives his Sir's piss out of service. he becomes proficient in taking his Sir's piss so that not a drop is wasted.


• a boy allows his playful nature to naturally emerge. he understands that this playfulness must never compromise the respect and the service that he gives to the Sir.


• a boy wears his Leather and fetish wear under the direction of the Sir. he never wears more Leather than his Sir. he does not wear Leather that is not given or that is not approved for his use by his Sir. Before every Leather event, he asks, “What would you like me to wear, Sir?”


• a boy treats Leather with respect. he cares for the Leather of his Sir when required. he pays special attention to boots and learns bootcare. Boots are the foundation of Leather.


• In terms of dress, Leather is never worn haphazardly. a boy never wears athletic shoes with his Leather coat. he does not wear underwear unless it is a jock strap. And he tucks in his T-shirt, worn with a black Leather belt. Jeans must fit properly and not be dirty.


• a boy understands that his collar belongs to his Sir. It is not his. The collar is off limits to others. No one must touch his collar. If someone tries to touch a boy's collar, he is to state in a firm but mannerly fashion, “Please do not touch my collar. It belongs to my Sir.”


• In a public dungeon space, a boy carries the toy bag. he is either naked or wears a jock strap and boots. he stands by the space to be used in play with his hands behind his back and bows his head until his Sir is ready. he does not speak to others without permission. And when the scene is over, he remains by his Sir's side.


• When at a Leather event, a boy does not wander off or carry on conversations with others unless he obtains his Sir's permission.


• a boy does not play outside of established protocols. All play with other sirs is done with the express permission of his Sir. his Sir negotiates this play directly with other sirs. he should not actively cruise or seek play other than with his Sir. If he wants to play with others, he asks his Sir's permission privately.


• a boy never speaks negatively about his Sir. All negotiations and issues are done directly with his Sir in private. Violation of this tenet puts the Sir/boy bond at risk and could be grounds for removing the collar. Of course, a boy should always assume responsibility for his own safety and seek help outside of the Sir/boy relationship if there is abuse. If this happens, the bond has already been compromised.


• a boy is always honest with his Sir. Dishonesty and deceit destroy trust and warrant removal of the collar.

As a Sir I have learned the reciprocal responsibilities that I have relative to each of these items.

Ultimately, a Sir is defined by how he treats his boy and a boy is defined by how he treats his Sir. My alpha and I joke that I am Batman to his Robin. Inseparable.

Good luck to Sir John as he serves as Mid-Atlantic LeatherSIR for the second year. And to his new Title Family. Wishing them a great year of service to the Community.

Sex and Self Care

Twenty-five years ago I had sex the first time with a Leatherman. Prior to our first session, he told me about HIV, STDs and Hepatitis. He delivered his message without moralizing or passing judgment. After three hours, I left his house not only with bleeding nipples and bruised pecs, but also with an understanding of all the risks involved in man to man sex.

Because of the lack of publicly funded programs to properly address Gay men's sexual health, we had to take care of ourselves in the eighties. Like the love that dare not speak its name, many government officials remained silent when it came to health risks and HIV. Indeed, the tactics of public officials were dysfunctional at best. Law enforcement raids and closures of bathhouses did little more than to ostracize most Gay men and, in particular, Leathermen.

Although the tactics of most government funded agencies have changed, our responsibility to disseminate information regarding health and STDs has not. We must take the lead in educating our own, recognizing that Leathermen are sexual by nature. We must be direct without demonizing those men who decide to engage in behavior that differs from our own. Indeed, moralizing sexual behavior always backfires in the Leather Community, as we delight in violating platitudes. Guilt has little use in our world other than as a tool in play.

Because Leathermen are extremely sexual by nature, we must recognize the risks involved in our behavior and assume responsibility for taking care of ourselves. When a man sucks my cock, I know that I am at risk for gonorrhea, herpes, and syphilis. And when two men feast on my member, I double that risk. To stop getting blows jobs, to stop having group sex, or to expect myself to be monogamous is tantamount to castration. For this reason, I understand that I must -

1. Know my body. I examine my cock, balls, mouth, and asshole every morning, noting any unusual discharges, lesions, or sensations out of the ordinary, especially when I piss or cum.


2. Contact my doctor immediately regarding anything out of the ordinary.


3. Get vaccinated against Hep A and B. Vaccinations are available at the doctor's office and at most public health clinics. They are often offered free to those who cannot pay.


4. Get HIV testing every 4 – 6 months.


5. Request STD testing from my doctor every 4 – 6 months. It is especially important to be tested for syphilis on a regular basis as it can go undetected. The effects of syphilis are serious, ranging from neurological problems to blindness, especially dangerous in men with HIV. The doctor should also test for gonorrhea in all potential areas of infection. I do not give many blow jobs or get fucked. Even so, I want throat and anal swabs done just in case.


6. Speak honestly with my doctor about my sexual practices. If a Leatherman cannot be honest with his doctor, then I suggest he find the balls to come out as a pervert or to change health care providers. Some doctors are not Gay friendly, never mind Leather friendly. Find someone who you are comfortable with.


7. Make friends with your local STD clinic. Where is it located in case of an emergency? I need to know not only where but what services the clinic offers to my Community. On a recent visit, I was surprised to find that the survey in King County, Washington was virtually useless for transpeople and the people who have sex with them. I must speak up if services do not cater to my Community.


8. Communicate with my your sexual partners. Both insertive and receptive men are responsible for open discussion regarding sex, play, and risks. I grow tired of sensational articles from the media that demonize tops when speaking about HIV transmission. A bottom is not a fucking victim! He is as much responsible for the action as the top. In fact, if a bottom can't claim his asshole, I don't want to fuck him no matter how hot he appears to be.


9. Avoid sex parties and bathhouses IF I have gonorrhea or syphilis. Wait until I am fully treated. Given that I care about the men in my Community, I do not want to spread these STDs to others.

These are the things that I have decided to do to keep myself and my Community healthy. I encourage each man to make his own list as part of his health regimen.

Respect for others begins with respect for self.

Leather Contests and Hard Cocks: Southwest LeatherSIR/Leatherboy Contest, Phoenix, AZ

When I came out as a Gay man I immediately felt an attraction to Leather. I stood in awe the first time I saw an older, muscled Leatherman in tight-fitting trousers. I formed my first fantasies the night I watched two masculine men walk hand in hand while wearing vests and chaps, their bulging cocks outlined in their tight jeans. And I will never forget the night when a handsome, titleholder knelt before me, took my cock into his mouth, and showed me what a blow job truly felt like. Twenty-five years later as a judge for Southwest LeatherSIR/Leatherboy contest, I still ultimately define Leather by what makes my cock hard.

There are no holds barred during an ILSb interview, with questions ranging from play techniques and personal history to the straightforward query, “Would you drop your pants?” I have judged quite a number of contests but nothing prepared me for the response of the winning boy contestant. After stripping off his Leather shorts, naked except for his harness and boots, he got down on all fours and began bucking like a rodeo bull. Double kicks, pawing the ground, nearly humping the floor while he tossed his head from side to side. His antics betrayed a sexual energy that had been masked during his earlier verbal responses. He arose, partially tumescent and panting.

“Well, you enjoyed that,” I observed, referring to his lengthening cock.

“Yes,” he said out of breath.

And, as if in response, I felt my own cock push hard against my tight jeans.

On Saturday night, this same boy suspended himself from a frame on stage. Midway through his fantasy, I heard him growl quietly to his top, “Hit me harder!” His musclar top obliged, flogging his naked ass with more abandon and then shoving a nightstick hard up the boy's jockstrapped hole. With no shame, the boy privileged us with full view of his sculpted ass. En face, in ballet terms. A true fantasy, I am sure that many in the audience retreated home after the contest and stroked their cocks with that image fresh in their minds.

I awarded a perfect score to the Sir contestant for his fantasy, something I rarely do. The Sir started his fantasy by picking up a handsome boy clad only in a cotton jock and boots, After slamming the boy on a raised table, he shackled his hands and feet together, and then proceeded to play the boy's body with a violet wand. The violent wand worked well against the darkness of the outdoor stage and the boy's defined body. Phrasing his play with deep, mouth-probing kisses, the Sir continued to build the intensity of the scene. Finally, the Sir pushed a twenty dollar bill hard into the boy's gaping mouth and made a hasty exit. A brutal contrast to the passion of the scene. Rough Trade indeed!

Adding to the sexual energy of the contest, I attended a formal Leather dinner and a victory brunch. Both full of hot men. Banter was cruisy and light-hearted, Leathermen accentuating their embellishments of yellow and red with personal comments about the previous night's, post contest play. Here was a group of like-minded, horny men that also defined their Leather by rough play. They were men like myself who understood that brotherhood is founded not only on trust, honesty, and integrity, but also on good, hard cock.

Congratulations to Sir Bill and boy Robert, the new Southwest titleholders. Two hot men. Can't wait to see your combined fantasy at ILSb/ICBB in July.