What a boy wants: IML 2011, Chicago, IL

I attended this year's International Mr. Leather Weekend in Chicago with two of my boys. Both very different men yet both united in the bond of Leather Family. During the weekend the boys seldom left my side. After greeting me, a friend exclaimed, “Sir, you are dripping boys!” Even while congratulating the new IML Eric Eric Guttierez, the boys were close at hand.

This year's IML was more than simply a celebration of Leathersex with like-minded men. With my two boys, I rushed from one event to another, building to a climactic play session each day back in the hotel room. On Monday, I played with one boy for almost 12 hours in an almost uninterrupted scene, punctuated by short breaks for meals. At midnight we finally both collapsed on the bed.

“Play makes me feel more alive,” the boy observed after the heavy session, his back welted and bleeding from another single tail session. A paradoxical statement, considering the exhaustion that was quickly setting in.

As a Sir, my role is to create an environment in which my boys can explore themselves and the bond we share together. Heavy play facilitates the creation of that environment. With the body bruised and the mind flooded with the body's chemicals, a boy drops the defenses his public mask affords. No longer able to think clearly, he relies totally on the Dominant to guide him out of pain's immediate darkness. And finally, after enduring an odyssey of heroic proportions, the boy finds his way home with his Sir by his side. The result, a greater understanding of one's strength beyond the social definitions of masculinity.

In spite of the paternal role that I often play in the lives of my boys, the environment of our play is far from nurturing. It is filled with spit, piss, blood, and cum. The emotions cycle from laughter to tears, from love to repulsion, from unity to loneliness, and from boldness to sheer terror. Uniting these emotions together is our shared sexual hunger, an integral component of every scene.

The trust necessary to play on this edge begins long before the scene. The Sir must demonstrate His dedication to the boy from day to day. Essentially, the Sir must condition the boy to trust him through a pattern of service. This tempers the bond between Sir and boy sufficiently to totally submit. The essential exchange that becomes the foundation of a boy's sexual identity.

In an interview with Joseph Bean, John Siracusa, International Drummerboy 1990-1991, states:

Being a Boy is an expression of my sexuality. It allows me to go within myself and nurture the child inside of me. I feel that due to the pressure from society to conform, that we lose track of our innocence and childlike behavior, the things that allow us to be free spirits. Being a Boy is growing up all over again. (Drummer Issue 150; Desmodus, Inc; San Francisco, CA; September 1991)

John does not say that he expects his Sir to nurture him. Instead, he recognizes the responsibility to nurture himself, acknowledging that a boy is still a man.

Indeed, I expect my boys to be men. In play each redefines himself and his body. Whether by a lash on the back, a boot in the groin, or my cock shoved deep inside his guts, the boy knows that I expect him to drop the social mask in order to expose his true self. This is the beginning of the honesty upon which our bond is built.

I am proud to be International LeatherSIR this year, representing the Sirs and boys in the players' Community. I am especially proud to spend the last two months of my Title year standing in service next to Eric Guttierez. Wishing him a great year as International Mr. Leather 2011.